3-Get This Party Started

3

Get This Party Started

Harriet was not stupid.  She knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that she could not physically take down the toned, Mexican death machine.  The three of them, together, might have a chance.  Thanks to Thad’s constant fear of being maimed and Ein’s basic lack of stature, it was up to her to give them the opportunity.  She saw that the only path to do this was to take the large and certainly sharp Machete out of play.

Harriet dove onto the man’s outstretched arm, wrapping both arms around his and locking her body.  He immediately started to try to wrench himself free, but Harriet held tight.  She held tight with a purpose.

The scream echoed through the hallway with such volume that everyone, including the Mexican froze in their tracks.  The struggle was momentarily halted to watch the spectacle of Thad, screaming like a female victim in a Wes Craven slasher-film.  Thad then turned and bolted at full speed in the opposite direction, his wail continued to echo through the hallway.

Harriet, the small woman that she was, dressed only in a bikini top and a pair of cargo shorts, grasped a trained killer’s Machete hand for dear life.  She stared down the hall as her friend vanished.

She shook her head.  “You have got to be kidding me!”

Harriet’s sarcastic remark seemed to wake everyone up to the situation that was at hand and the Mexican, yet again, tried to pull free, almost succeeding this time, catching Harriet of guard.  Harriet, however, wasn’t giving up that easy and held on for dear life.

It was all in Eisenhower’s hands now, poor, little, cowardly Ein.

Harriet couldn’t help but think they were doomed as Ein manage to break free and went to the floor as if to scramble away.

Just great, I’m going to die for a couple of cowards.

No sooner did Harriet think that, when Ein came from the floor rising and whirling Thad’s pipe in his hand.  With a wet thud, the pipe connected to the side of the assailant’s head.  The Mexican’s body went limp and his head dropped to the metal floor.  Blood was seeping from his wound.

Harriet stared down at him breathing hard.  She spun and looked at Ein, whose face was racked with torture.  Had he just killed a man?  Had Eisenhower Mills just broken a man’s head with a pipe?

“Get some rope,” Ein said, suddenly catching his breath.  “I’ll watch him.”

“Are you okay?”  Harriet asked, earnestly.

Ein shook his head, “I don’t even understand the word anymore.  Just get some rope.”

Harriet nodded and began to run off when Ein caught her arm with his left hand.  She looked back as he said, “And Harry, we are going to need the doctor.”

****

Who’s The Doctor you ask?

“You invited the doctor?”  Ein yelled in shock and anger as the entire pier looked their direction, including the ship captain who was preparing their boat for the ride to Ein’s new oil rig.

Thad grimaced.  “Calm down.  What was I supposed to do?”

“A lot of things, Thad,” Ein responded.  “None of which involved inviting the one guy, beyond all others, we can’t stand!”

Thad frowned, “Come on.  How else was I going to get chicks to come along?”

Ein stared at him, “Let me ask you this Thad, how are we going to get anywhere with these chicks while he’s making us look like idiots?”

Thad rolled his eyes, “It won’t be that bad!”

It was, at this point, that a car horn sounded.  This was no ordinary car horn, it was loud, tornado warning loud.  It instantly pulled Ein, Thad, and everyone else’s attention to it.  The horn belonged to a large, very shiny, orange Hum-V.

“Here we go.” Ein muttered.

The Hum-V parked and the doors opened.  Women seemed to pour from the sides.  All were wearing bikinis that could barely be considered clothing.  They were all giggling as they got out, and seemed happy with their lack of ambition.  With that, the driver’s side door opened and, in what seemed like slow motion, out stepped a man.

He stood six-feet, two-inches tall and had chiseled features, resembling the actor Bradley Cooper.  His hair was short and slicked back with a shine to it that dazzled in the afternoon L.A. sun.  He had on no shirt, which showed off his tight six-pack abs and toned upper body, which was peppered with, what felt to Ein to be the perfect amount of chest hair.  His eyes, which were of course blue, were covered by dark reflective Aviator sunglasses.

Chad Sorin.  The doctor.

They had met the Doctor a couple of times before.  He was a pre-med student, looking to be a surgeon.  At least during the day, he was.  At night, he was the Playboy of the year, moving from bar to bar taking what he wanted of the female population and leaving his seconds for Ein and Thad.

Not that they had much luck with the seconds, let alone the firsts.

The train of woman moved past Ein and Thad and onto the boat, which made the boat captain (who up until this point had been very hard to deal with) downright pleasant. The doctor walked up smiling.  And why wouldn’t he be?  People like the doctor never had reasons to frown.

“Nerds!”  He said, then threw his hands to his sides as if shocked that they could pull something like this off.  “I must say, I never thought I would be spending spring break anywhere near the two of you!”

Ein faked a smile.  “Right back at you.”

The doctor picked up on the sarcasm and cocked his head to one side to look at Ein.  “It’s Eisenhower, right?  How does it feel to have a dog’s name, chief?”

Ein grumbled under his breath and the doctor’s smile widened.  “Oh, come on!  It’s all good, brother!”

The doctor then slapped Ein on the shoulder.  “We’re all friends here, right?”

Ein, rubbing his shoulder where the doctor had hit it, opened his mouth to say something, but Thad cut in.  “Thanks for coming Chad!  Man did you bring some fine honeys.”

Chad turned back to Thad, then to the gaggle on the boat.  “What?  Oh yeah, I guess so… I have done better, but it’s all about quantity this week.”

“Who are they?”  Ein asked, stepping between Thad and the doctor.

Chad looked confused.  “The women?”

Ein sighed.  “Yes, do they have names?”

The doctor seemed to grimace in pain, then turned toward the flock and began to point them out one by one.

First the red head, “That’s Stephanie.”

Then he pointed to one of the two blondes, “Candice, but she likes to go by the name Candy.”

He punctuated the last statement with a dirty like laugh then pointed at the brown haired and the black haired girls, “Sarah and Sandy.”

He then went back to the other blonde.  “Tiffany.  God, I love the Tiffany’s.”

Finally, he pointed at the woman of Asian descent, long black hair up in a ponytail.  “And her.  I have no idea.  Let’s just call her Egg Roll.”

Ein’s face exploded with shock.  “What?  I’m not calling her that!”

The doctor laughed now, louder and more obnoxious then he should have, given the situation.  “That’s what I like about you, boss, You have that old school chivalry thing going for you.  You probably don’t ever get laid like that but, hey you’re one of the good ones.”

Ein’s nostrils flared and his eye twitched as the doctor laughed and hopped into the boat after his ladies.  Thad smiled, then looked at Ein whose face was twisted in rage.

“You’re a moron.”  Ein said with complete ice in his tone.

“What did Thad do this time?”  Harriet’s voice came from behind them and they turned to see that she had made her way down the pier, finally arriving for the trip.  Ein was flabbergasted as he stared.  She was in a bikini top with a very thin white over shirt, unbuttoned in the front and blowing in the sea air.  Her hair was lose and writhed around her head and glasses like something out of a dream.  Eisenhower was stricken…

“Earth to Ein,” Harriet said, snapping Ein out of his day dream.

“What?” Ein asked.

“What did Thad do that made him a moron?” she asked a second time.

“Nothing Harry, I just-” Thad began, but Ein raised his hand and silenced the tall thin man.

Ein then pointed on the boat.  Harriet’s gaze followed the figure and as she saw what waited for her, the smile dropped off Harriet’s face.

“You invited the doctor?” she asked, miserably.

“I don’t see what’s so bad about that!” Thad said, frustrated but Harriet just shook her head.

“Thad, you’re a moron.”

TO BE CONTIUED….